“The most terrifying thing is to accept oneself completely.”~ C. G. JUNG
Dear Readers, Community, Friends,
What are the facets of “you?”
If I were to ask you this simple question, “What one word describes you?” What would you say? Fill in this blank: “I am only __________________.”
In contrast, how many ways can you identify yourself with, “I am ___________.” (try to think of at least 10).
At any time in your life, have you found yourself identifying with something, like being an athlete, doctor, artist, etc., only to feel distress when your life situation has changed?
Read on in our Little Virtual Book Club, where Brad Stulberg encourages us to passionately pursue our callings, but not to solely identify with them.
In Part 2, “Rugged and Flexible Identity”, we learn the value of diversifying our source of meaning, and creating a fluid sense of self.
He touches on field theory: how our environment affects our sense of self. And Brad encourages us to adopt a “Both, And” perspective, instead of “Either, Or,” residing both with the Interdependent Self (connected with others) and the Independent Self (our traits, abilities, and attributes are unique).
We learn that how we perceive the world is a learned phenomena, and we can stretch ourselves to see the world in multiple ways. Ah, can you feel the freedom in this?
He touches on Jane Loevinger’s “9 Key Stages to ego development,” which might be fun to scroll through and see: do you operate in multiple stages, simultaneously?
Pre-Social (infancy): The baby has no ego until it differentiates from caregivers and the outer environment.
Impulsive: The young child is driven by emotions, interpreting caregiver responses as either “nice” or “mean.” Their focus is on present events, not the past or future.
Self-Protective: At this stage, the child develops basic self-control, focusing on a strict moral code and consequences, while also avoiding detection.
Conformist: As the child grows, they become more aware of societal norms and the importance of belonging to a group. Good behavior is dictated by the group's standards, leading to suspicion towards those outside the group. Trust among group members is crucial for cohesion.
Self-Aware: Loevinger believed this stage represents the model for most adult behavior, with few surpassing it before age twenty-five. It marks the start of self-criticism, envisioning multiple life possibilities, and an awareness of the difference between the "real me" and the "expected me," albeit still influenced by conformist pressures.
Conscientious: Individuals in this stage internalize societal rules, acknowledge exceptions, and feel guilt for hurting others. They see life as choices they make, with complex views of others including their inner motives with their outer actions.
Individualistic: This stage includes a respect for individuality in oneself and a tolerance toward the individual differences in others. The person at this stage is more sensitive to the complexities of inner experience and the conflict between subjective reality and outward appearances.
Autonomous: Self-fulfillment surpasses outer achievement at this stage, with increased self-acceptance and respect for the autonomy of others. A greater capacity to embrace polarities of life, discern complexity in individual situations, and assess multiple facets in moral decisions is present.
Integrated: Similar to Maslow's self-actualization, this stage exhibits inner wisdom, deep empath for others, and self-acceptance, representing a fully developed ego that values individuality for oneself and others. Few reach this level, according to Loevinger. {source: American Institute for Learning and Human Development}
For June, let’s read PART 3: “Rugged and Flexible Actions.” If anything strikes you to share, let me know and I’ll share it with the group!
HOW TO BRIDGE YOUR COMPANY’S SKILLS GAPS: A GUIDE FOR EMPLOYERS
As an employer, it’s crucial that you understand how to mitigate any skill gaps within your workforce. Skill gaps are the discrepancies between your expectations for your employees and your employee’s actual abilities. For example, if you’re expecting your employees to produce at a certain rate, and they’re only able to produce at half that speed, there is a skill gap present.
FROM INDIVIDUAL TO TEAMS: TOOLS TO OVERCOME WORKPLACE CONFLICTS
Workplace conflicts are a natural side effect of bringing together people with different talents and opinions. For every problem, there are several solutions. In every group, more than one person may want to take the lead. For every challenge, some may try to shift responsibility or blame. A good leader learns to recognize the root of each conflict, then uses the tools at their command to resolve conflicts and prevent them from recurring in the future.
I hope you are enjoying the perfect weather spring has brought to our mountains, and have had opportunities to get outside.
We recently had an informative webinar with our partners at McGuire Wood & Bissette covering the recent FLSA changes, FTC Non-Compete Regulations, the Pregnant Worker Fairness Act, and the EEOC Guidance on Harassment Claims. Thank you, Sabrina Presnell Rockoff and Murphy Horne Fletcher for your expertise!
Attendance for the webinar was high and brought back memories of our COVID webinar series, when we all gathered together to weather that global storm. I am grateful to live in a community that is mutually supportive and connected.
